Is This Healer Legit?

3 Truths About Red Flags, Green Flags, and What's Real

You've seen the social media healers promising instant miracles, the ones who speak in vague spiritual language that sounds profound but means nothing, the ones who make you feel like you're broken and only they can fix you. And you're wondering: how do I tell who's real? Who's actually doing the work versus performing it? Who can hold the depth I need versus just talking about holding space? The truth is, legitimate healers don't need to convince you they're legitimate. Their work speaks for itself. But knowing what to look for - and what to run from - matters.

Here are 3 Soul Sparks for recognizing red flags, green flags, and what makes a healer legitimate.

SOUL SPARK #1

What makes a spiritual healer legitimate versus just performative?

Legitimate healers speak from lived experience, not borrowed concepts. They're not performing enlightenment - they're embodying the work they've done on themselves. They don't claim to have all the answers or position themselves as gurus. They don't need you to stay dependent on them - they want you to become sovereign. Performative healers use spiritual language to sound impressive but can't hold you through the actual mess of transformation. They overpromise, guarantee outcomes, make you feel like you're not spiritual enough if their work doesn't land for you. Legitimate healers are honest about what's possible, realistic about timelines, and clear about what they can and can't do. They don't bypass your pain with toxic positivity. They don't shame you for not healing fast enough. And they've done enough of their own work that they're not using you to heal their wounds. Legitimacy isn't about credentials - it's about integrity, depth, and whether they can actually facilitate what they claim to offer.

SOUL SPARK #2

What are the red flags to watch out for when choosing a spiritual healer?

Red flags include making big promises with no nuance, guaranteeing results, or saying you'll be healed in one session. They may make it sound like their method is the only way. They position themselves as the only one who can help you, creating dependency instead of empowerment. They use shame, guilt, or fear to keep you coming back. They can't admit when something's not their expertise. They overshare about their own trauma in ways that center them instead of you. They bypass hard emotions with "love and light" instead of actually holding you through the mess. They're more interested in their image than your healing. They make you feel like you're broken and only they have the fix. They can't handle your questions, your doubts, or your need for clarity. And the biggest red flag: your body contracts around them. If your body is saying no, even when your mind wants to believe - trust that.

SOUL SPARK #3

What are the green flags that show a healer is trustworthy and grounded?

Green flags include being honest about what healing actually looks like - messy, nonlinear, deep. Not overpromising or guaranteeing outcomes. Talking about integration, not just breakthroughs. They're transparent about their process, their training, their own healing journey without making it about them. They hold space for your doubt, your resistance, your fear without taking it personally. They empower you to trust yourself, not just trust them. They don't need you to see them as special - they see you as whole, even when you feel broken. They're clear about boundaries, timelines, and what to expect. They don't make you feel like you're not doing it right if healing doesn't look a certain way. They meet you where you are and where you could be without judgment. And they've done their own deep work - not performing spirituality, but living it. Green flags feel like relief, like finally being seen, like you can stop performing and just be real. If a healer makes you feel safer in your own skin, that's a really important green flag to note.

Every time you trust the red flags your body shows you, honor the green flags that feel like home, and choose someone who empowers you instead of needing you - you're honoring yourself. If you're ready for healing work that's grounded, honest, and actually transformative, explore RITUALS and Constellations - programs designed to meet you in the mess, hold the depth, and facilitate real change without the performance.

Xx, Shaia

Soul Sparks is part of Rituals by Shaia - a multidimensional series of healing programs for times of change, grief, and sacred rebuilding when you are walking through transformation, rupture, and the process of becoming who you truly are.

Ready to begin? Explore RITUALS here.